in the shadows of heartbreak, i find my light. (poem)

in the shadows of heartbreak

in the questions that burn & simmer & bubble inside my chest,

hot like lava, a little too slippery, hot & curious---

did i do the right thing? 

was it all my fault, where we went wrong, my dear? 

in the shadows of heartbreak

in the angelic cusps of my dripping tears

i find my light again. 

in the shadows of a broken heart

i realize my heart is not broken

it's simply the tenacious chaos

of my life

being rearranged. 

yes, it's messy, and it hurts so much but--- 

can i surrender to this? 

can i let it happen? 

the Goddess unzips me at the seams

as i breathe heavy and hope for the best

but i don't need hope, she says

i need knowing

i need myself

and i am

revealed to me

like a scroll

in the shadows of this heartbreak

i show up

fiercely, fully

and yes, there is sadness

the screaming grief of this loss

the wish that the potential of our love was made manifest. 

but there is springtime

there is me:

standing tall, even in the pain

about to bloom,

ready to blossom so madly. 

now. 

right now. 

it's time. 

in the shadows of heartbreak,

i remember how strong i really am. 

nothing can take that away from me, 

not any amount of pain. 

because this is my spring. 

it smells so sweet. 

it tastes like the magic

of beautiful things to come. 

 

 

 

 

 

photo: pixabay.